Sparring too early is why most beginners quit - not too little of it

Everyone loves saying "just get in there and spar, that's how you learn." I think it's the most expensive piece of advice in combat sports.

Half the beginners I've seen get thrown into sparring before they even have basic defense down. They get outclassed and demoralized in week two, and they never come back. That's not toughening up. That's just quitting with extra steps.

And the gyms that do this aren't finding the "real fighters". They're filtering for people who were already tough, athletic or reckless when they walked in, then taking the credit for it.

Here's my bias, though: you can't get good at boxing or MMA by randomly showing up and winging it either. You need something closer to a campus: a place you keep coming back to, where every visit adds up to actual progress instead of scattered one-off tips or getting thrown in the deep end too soon.

So my rule would be: no live sparring until you can keep your guard up, move your feet and take a jab without closing your eyes. Six weeks minimum, and light technical rounds long before anything hard.

Too soft? When did you first spar, and did it make you or nearly break you? Coaches: what's your rule?